"The Solution to End War and Bullying: Disarm" gagablog 41

I've talked about the bullying by groups, society, corporations and states and how war, poverty, and suffering in general are all symptoms of the same problem of bullying. It's always people in a position of power hurting those who are less powerful, according to the given system, instead of helping them. It's always the same mentality whether it is cliques in school, greedy corporations and republicans, or nations that kill people, from Syria to the USA. To finally solve the problem I want to address it on the individual level. The traditional bully, like Nelson Muntz in the Simpsons, uses violence to feel superior to his peers. He does this as a last resort because he feels inferior in so many other ways. Poverty is a major cause of his isolation and he endures great suffering due to his lifestyle. He then takes this pain out on the other kids by hurting them physicaly and threatening and mocking them to hurt them emotionally. He takes power over his peers to make up for feeling powerless in life and he does it with violence. It would be admirable to turn those conditions into motivation to better himself or his home, to develop a talent that others would respect him for so that he could build community despite his disadvantages. Realizing that opportunity could be difficult, however, and while beating up other kids is not the "easy way" it makes them fear you, which is not the same as respect but if it seems like the closest the bully will get to respect or control he will take it. I use Nelson as an example to show how being bullied by society that condemns poverty instead of helping the poor realize opportunities creates individual bullies who hurt other kids. But it is a mentality we share and the Nelsons of the schoolyards are one version of bully while nations can be another. We are all part of this culture of bullying and can all put a stop to it - and we need to.
I think the most important part of the brief study of Nelson I've just done is the idea that violence is his last resort after feeling inferior in every other category. When the whole sad situation arises from being disadvantaged it is all the more important to remember that there is always another option. The whole idea of owning firearms for self-defense presumes and even creates the kill-or-be-killed mentality. I agree with Dr. Who that we don't need to carry weapons because we don't expect to use them, To think otherwise is acting savagely and continuing a savage mentality that we should have outgrown as a species long ago. But who can blame individuals who think this way when the nations we live in think and act like this? In the 2012 election season when republican challengers are trying to show how much more warmongering they are than Obama, war with Iran over their potential nuclear program seems more and more likely. When I hear that the American and Isreali governments are telling Iran they cannot have a nuclear weapon, when "we" have many nuclear weapons, I feel like a bully. For an analogy I think about a gunfighter in a showdown who already has a gun drawn on someone. What's the best way to avoid someone getting shot? If he says "throw down your gun" it might sound hostile and provoke a violent response - telling someone what to do from a position of power is bullying and can make the other person act on what they think is a last resort by being put in that position, being disadvantaged. He could say "you don't need that gun" which is ultimately the truth if no one really wants to get shot. If the only reason to carry a gun is as a deterrent then all you need to know is that the other person is not going to use theirs, either as a bully or a crazy person. If both parties can agree that they don't really need a gun they can get rid of them. But even telling someone they don't need a gun, while holding a gun, could be unclear, confusing, or even seem untrue. The best way for the gunfighter to communicate that the other person does not need his gun is to throw down his own gun. It may be a brave thing to do but it really isn't that risky, it just presumes that people aren't crazy and don't want to kill each other, and it sends the clear, important message that "I don't want to kill you." Building on that presumption is what lets us feel more civilized but we still have weapons. As nations an individuals we should trust each other and find more ways to relate so we never feel like we need weapons. We can break the cycle of fear and violence by building on goodwill and trust between each other so that we can get rid of all weapons and all the fear that goes with them..
I think we should expect this of our own governments and change our military industries to more beneficial ends just as the energy companies that will survive will be the ones that leave oil and coal and nuclear and transform to harnessing renewable energy. I'm heartened by the fact that Russia has called for a cease-fire in Syria and was encouraged by the call from American legislators to halt arms purchases from the Russian company that is supplying Syria with arms. This was a step towards the idea that we should seek non-violent solutions, that military is not necessary - but just a small step. I hope the various forms of pressure will be enough to halt the violence in Syria but the solution may ultimately come from within as the people have often insisted. I think the nonviolent solution they will find will be surprising but will also be the model for how we all adress conflcit in the future and become the standard, mainly because it will come from a commitment to finding a peaceful solution which will be the expectation in the coming age. And it may come from rising awareness withing Syria of the crimes going on so that people abandon Assad's regime. I wanted to write this a few weeks ago when the news was of a prominent businessman defecting from Assad and encouraging others to follow. The emptying of support for a murderous regime will cause it to collapse and even though it has not happened yet it may come soon and that man will have set the example. But it may also take the influence of other countries to enforce a cease-fire. The one year anniversary of the protests there was just the other day and while such events can gather energy I think it is a magical principle that the most powerful changes come from something subtle within that and not at the expected time, but maybe made possible by that collection of energy around a milestone. I can only assume that when the extent and details of the terrible things the regime has done there are made known to the world the response will end the bullying regime, and it may rely on people's decisions inside Syria but could be provoked by stronger outrage from outside.
It may in fact be a matter of currency and whether enough flows in to support the bully. In this way it reminds me of the outcry when Rush Limbaugh called that lady bad names, bullying her as he is always bullying people with his immense radio power. But the response from the public and effect on advertisers may take that power away and rightfully so, even though some predict he is "too big" for this to happen. I think that on the contrary it will be an example to people of how they can end bullying with their choices of how they spend their money. Buying from companies who support things you  believe in will ultimately allow the better ones to thrive and do the most good in the world. Becoming aware of which companies support bullies and war will drive them out of business and their influence out of society. They didn't think Limbaugh would ever fall but when he does it will be an example to people of what their conscience and decisions can achieve.
In our own lives we can only try to take care of people and prevent bullying and the conditions that lead to it. If we could understand that the crazy people who shoot other people need to be cured before they kill and that they are symptoms of sickness in a society that we are all part of, when we take responsibilty to take care of each other, then we won't blame the lone crazy killer in the sense that we want to kill him. We won't focus on who to blame and shoot because it won't go that far, because instead we will focus on identifying who needs help and what he needs to feel he has another option, to be a part of society again. We have to be able to change society to take responsibility for everyone in it. I'm thinking of the soldier who so horrifically abused his power and access to weapons and killed all those civilians in Afghanistan. Now they are talking about the factors that led to him doing this and I hope they can prevent similar things, though the sad truth is that similar things have been happening and the nature of the conflict is like being  a bullying aggressor. If we are a more advanced country we should be that much better at finding a peaceful solution. If we could always be looking for ways to creatively address the problems that lead to bullying and violence we can stop it and stop feeling like we need to fear one another. We can do this as nations, in our own communities small and large, and in our daily interactions. It's only by opposing bullying in all its forms, at all levels, that we can end it but when we do have that focus we can end it forever.  All it takes is accepting that we are all better than that and deciding that we won't consider violence an option anymore. When we act in this way and care for each other we will lift ourselves out of the lives where we feel the stress to be violent or where anyone is so disadvantaged, or that some people are so empowered, that they feel that violence is the solution to their problems.