gagablog 112: Aura - Burqa - the Magic of Separation

I heard twenty minutes or so of Radio this morning, KUVO 89.3 FM in Denver, the Oasis in the City, public jazz station, I've been listening to for weeks. Pretty much everything I heard deserved mention here. It started with a news story about Germany considering banning full face coverings, which of course made me think of Aura since I was writing about it last night. Since I knew I would write a whole edition I went on facebook to share my last one, since this could be out in a few hours, and a group chat I found myself in convinced me to do a fairy magic workshop at Denver Pagan Pride next week. So I'm playing Artpop again and writing this. A moment ago I decided I would play the Boy George cd I got after this, to make magic for them to meet, him and Stefani, and then she sang "just ask your gay friends their advice" - then I met a gay friend I had been estranged from for a year and we made up in a chatbox. Culture Club is coming here in October or November and I really want to go, and Artpop ended while I chatted so I'll replay it as I write and then put in the other disc. (Now I'm listening to it as I read over and "edit" - "Time" is on, now)

       These were the events on the radio this morning while taking my son to school. The news report said they were considering banning full face coverings in public places in Germany. They said it was the result of the ascension of a right-wing, islamophobic political party. Of course it reminds me of the Republikkkans here, but mostly I thought of Aura-Burqa. I looked it up to correct spelling and sure enough it's the top search result, currently- here is the link to the story from Al Jazeera:  . http://www.aljazeera.com/news/2016/08/german-minister-proposes-partial-burqa-ban-160819130010768.html

      It's a question of religious freedom and persecution of minorities but it can have the effect of dividing people, in real life, some people will avoid Germany, or other places with biased laws, because of the bias, if they can. Or they will suffer imposition of other values, for no reason other than fear and misunderstanding. I'm not claiming to understand the burqa but I do understand the principle of religious freedom and have been keenly aware of it in the American culture that claims to believe in it but practises a form of deeply entrenched bias. I immediately thought of Aura, of course, and how I had just written about it yesterday and how when it was just a rumor it was called "Burqa." Typing that makes me wonder if "Perfect Illusions" will be the final title of the new single, after all, but I love the rumor and resemblance to our Foxzen album "Curious Illusions."

      The problem is fear and misunderstanding divide people. People are scared of the burqa in one way because they fear feminine power: when Gaga sings "The veil is protection for the gorgeousness of my face" it can refer to protecting her face from the elements and attention but also to protecting the public from her gorgeousness. Why is that a good thing? It gets into issues I could discuss and debate within myself for some time but I've mentioned at least some of this before. The part I want to focus on now is the misunderstanding that the veil is a choice. Helping someone out of oppression and being forced into something is good, and surely some German Muslims could feel a liberation from the veil they didn't dare to seek for themselves, but as I typed that, re-starting Aura to check the lyrics, I got to the part where she says "I'm not a wandering slave I am a woman of choice." Most women are not forced and don't feel forced into wearing the veil, it is their choice, and to deny them this freedom is oppressive. It's also oppressive to say people cannot be naked in public or have different laws for different genders. There is a protest  coinciding with Denver Pagan Pride this year where women are going topless to protest the biased laws. They just happen to be meeting at Civic Center Park where we hold the festival. The problem with these laws is not just the effect they have on people living there, the decision that we don't want to understand each other but force assimilation out of fear, but they effect the whole world and people's perceptions of each other. Even if this does not pass, the story gives Germany a bad image and people will avoid it. The radio reported that one reason they are addressing this is because of thousands of refugees coming to Germany. Even deeper than that, as "Church of the Poison Mind" comes on, is that it affectes huge numbers of people's perception of "others" all around the world, on "both" sides - it increases the idea that there are "both" sides when the greater truth is that we are all on the same side. This relates to so many problems, of war and international politics, but on the face of it is the veil and I have something new to say about the magic of Separation.

       As Gaga sings "Goddess of Love!" I am about to type that I always talk about the magic of Love "but" now I want to talk about the magic of Separation. I actually should say "loving separation" but there are other, good kinds of separation between people that don't seem so "loving." Banning people's beliefs and expressions is so unloving, though, that you know you have gone wrong. You know your whole society, or major parts of it, have gone horribly wrong when bigoted ideas and policies become so popular as they have in Germany, the U.K., and America lately. And they have always had power,these have always been biased, oppressive systems. The difference is the Future threatens that power structure and they are exerting themselves, with violence and fear-based policies, to defend an old order that is doomed to be replaced by a more egalitarian one. You can't force everyone to be together, to be the same. You can encourage more understanding, more connection, by being welcoming to it and willing to learn more about others, to change yourself as well as expecting others to change.

     This policy and other hateful, fearful policies that oppress certain groups have the effect of separating people in a bad way. In this case it is all over a veil that:"separates" people, individually, in a personal way - presumably, hopefully only by the choice of the woman who wears the veil. But this is a choice and a personal magic that should be respected, like any other religious choice or any other fashion choice. I don't mean to demean either of those categories by connecting them like that, they obviously are connected because we are talking about fashions that conform and denote religious beliefs. I hope we can have the same courage to protect other religious expressions as we do to protect "our own" and I hope this attitude will also include fashion, art, and all expressions. The veil, like any fashion, like any art, is a choice of expression, a filter to address the world. Like your social media account. People have the need to express themselves and in a variety of ways. All expressions are both ways of connecting with others and, magically, veils for covering ourselves. Connections themselves are also separations, they establish a connection, at an ideal distance, between the wearer and viewer, between the artist and audience. This is how close you look at this painting, this is how surprised you are by this meme, this is how much this costume reveals, this is how much this music makes you danse, danse, dance, (thanks, fairies) or sit back and relax, or march or whatever. This is how much this story pulls you in, to it's characters, to yourself, or takes you along a journey that takes you out of yourself, or into yourself in a whole new way. My friend just mentioned that he was spacey, felt like he wondered what to do, then he suggested he might go save Atlantis, which made me ask if that was back in time or underwater, both, he said, and I reminded him of the part of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea where he surveys Atlantis. "Tailor these clothes to fit your guilt" she just sang as we light another. After this playing, since this part has the most to do with Artpop/ Aura I will put the Boy George back on. (I ended up listening to Artpop more but am on the Boy George cd as I read over this, now at Karma Chameleon and my friend is marvelling at how many big hits were him - I grew up with him - and part of my explanation of how you would hear so many was their own popularity at the time and the other was the increasing likeliness they show up in new media for various reasons including more depictions ot "the 80's" but I mention it because the "increase and collectivity" of it, into the future, is an analogy for Fairyland, to me.)

        In this case the magic of separation, of fashion, expression, art, is that it recognizes that we all are connected, we all see each other and influence each other, but our expressions are the way we choose to conduct or restrict those connections and those are the rights of who we are. ("Victms we know so well shine in your eyes when we kiss and tell" Boy George started singing at the start of this paragraph as I am reading this over.) I hope my art, music, and writing, and the way I interact with people, will attract people to me. ("Wishing there was some kind of heaven" - Victims again during reread) And I hope their art, etc, and appreciation of mine will cause us both to grow and change. The same is true for understanding other cultures. You have to have interaction to learn from each other ("even though she knows she's misunderstood" she just sang) and the best interactions are ones that are respectful to everyone, not putting some people at a disadvantage. (when I heard the second verse it is "they" kiss and tell and I wonder if I got it wrong, "we", the first time, or if it's just like that. "Feel like a child on a dark night, Wishing we could spend it together.")

       The next thing on the radio that got my attention was a groovy jazz tune by a group I forgot the name of but they described them as young musicians. The song was called "Double-consciousness" and was dedicated to W. E.B. Dubois. I've never read his work and my first instinct was that I need to read him. Also it made me curious what "double consciousness" could refer to. I have no idea, in the context he might have used it, but it makes me think of my recent writings about "I and I and I" and makes me want to explain that a little more. My impression is the Jamaican use of "I and I" where Americans might say "you and me" is a recognition of the deep level of sameness we experience. Gaga just sang "make deals with every devil in sight" and what I mean by adding a third "I" is to recognize "oneself" and "others" and equal and same but also remembering those "other i's" within us, as well as other people besides the "two" of you, present or various degrees of unpresent, away, passed away, ancestors, spirits, fairies, sprites, animals, elements, and everyone. I and I and I is all of us, but any "double-consciousness" that can free us from the "us and them", Me versus You mentality this bullshit world is based upon is good for us, a step towards Magic. "I think we - I think we'd have a good time" she just sang. You and I, I and I, more togetherness is good. Us versus them, with us or against us, is bad. We can turn all these misunderstandings into sources for greater, deeper connection if we just attempt to increase our consciousness or double it. I suspect there could be a negative connotation to double-consciousness, too, like having to act certain ways to appease a restrictive society. In this case it relates to the veil and that's all I will say about that before I get going again.

       So at this point I was already planning to write this and then the guest host on KUVO, Rodney Franks, spilled this anecdote. He moved to Denver in 1991 from Kansas City, to Broadway and Ellsworth, and the other host commented that it was ground Zero, which I take to mean the middle of the city at the time when Denver was about to start blowing up and transforming into what it is becoming and has come a long way already. He said he wanted to play the next song, from 1991, by Poncho Sanchez, from his Cambia album. I missed the name of the song but he explained why he wanted to play it. ("Ill Tumble For Ya" is on in the background as I reread, now) He said when he moved here the locals had a phrase they greeted each other with and it was "Hey Bud." I thought this was awesome, both because I never heard it before and because it is ironic that this became Bud Central since legalizing weed here. The song starts with someone cheering a greeting in Spanish then a reply of "Hey Bud!" Maybe he lived here, too, maybe it was just coincidence, but especially since it was the same year, because he chose the song because of that connection, I felt I should mention it. The previous song prompted me to put DuBois on my reading list, this one prompted me to write about the irony of using the word "Bud." But I guess that was all I was going to say, besides maybe giving credit to weed for bringing people together, magically.

      Then I came home to type this but before I did I shared my last one to facebook, since I hope to have this out in a few minutes, just a few hours later. And of course I got into some conversation there and I'm glad I did. At first it was a group chat with some fellow Bernie supporters who are into magic, only one was really active but we had some laughs and decided to hang out and smoke some weed sometime. Then I saw a post from that friend I had been bitchy to and lost, commented on it, sent him a message and apology and made up with him. That was really nice. Then I heard from the girl I like online, who I've had a few chats with in recent months but more sparsely. I need to call my friend who could be coming any day now to visit, too, and I can't wait. But all of this is to say that while I intended to write this, just about :"Hey Bud!", before any of this happened, it was kind of cool that I had more friendly interactions than I usually ever have, all once after the other. I guess this can be expected if you have been offline for a few weeks, too, but it was nice, I was glad about it, and liked how it related to the magic of hearing about and deciding to write about "Hey Bud." Social media can be awesome, it is one of these filters like art or veils that help us choose how we interact with each other and who we become. The more we can feel comfortable expressing who we really are, in certain contexts, environments, or with certain people, the more we will all grow and become who we really can be, the best of ourselves. Like the art we have a duty to make if we have a talent for it, making good art, magic, and love leaves less space for the bad stuff to come through. It's a service to all of us. And standing up for every way that each individual and culture prefers to do this is the best way to benefit from all of our wonderful diversity and learn things about ourselves and "others" we never would have learned before.

       I guess I was going to tie this into the idea of separation in relationships or even taking a break, separating in / from a relationship. I just don't even want to go there, now, I am glad my lover and I are getting along and feel better just giving her space and accepting that it isn't me, she is just mostly stressed with all her obligations to her craft, career and the community. I want to be able to help her with it, or at least relieve the stress, but sometimes the best thing you can do, for love, is allow some space. I have trouble recognizing that but I'm learning it better. It helps me to lose myself in my own work, art, writing, and music, especially, but even if I'm not "feeling it" it helps to have this new habit, increasing in the last few years and really appreciated this year, of reading books. I think I will do that, now, so I can find out what happens in Wildfell Hall, then read Morrissey's autobiography and get a copy of Dubois (in editing spellcheck just suggested Dubious, Dubs, Daubs and Dobs) and I also am reminded of Black Elk Speaks which has been on my shelf for years but I only read a couple of chapters a few months ago, in the middle about the killing of Crazy Horse. I like how books set a pace, like a kind of calendar-soundtrack, and a time-period's own pace and peculiar time as well, especially in the case of these classic books I have been reading, jumping around through the centuries. They both fit into and color the time on your calendar in which you read them, your life at that time, or times, and have their own time and pace and period, too, and this makes for very interesting fun when looking for magical connections between the two. Sons and Lovers was Too Close for me to put down and is maybe still too close for me to process. I felt like I was in such a hurry to write about it when I was reading it then as soon as I finished I gladly dove into Wildfell Hall and I appreciate the downgrade in intensity, so far, and how much I just relate to her phrasing, I love reading and reading as long as she wants to write, just as I feel impressed by anyone who suffers through this. And I want to spare you and move along, since I think you get what I mean.

       We, all of us living together and all of us passed on before, who we access through art or just spiritually, we are all in this dance together. We swirl around each other, meet and part. When the music gets really good we all get into it, there are no wallflowers and everyone feels at home in the rhythm. That reminds me of the first Foxzen song we ever made, then lost, but found the music for and just need to finish recalling the lyrics, or find the sheet, and re-record them, "Free Inside the Groove." I'll stop talking about what I will do, now, and  just do it. I know I keep saying that, here, but this is a veil that only I can choose to remove, in my own time, and I kind of have to discover more who I am and be more me before I do it, but I feel closer and closer to I and I and I all the time, I think we're coming together, and likely in unexpected ways and ways that exceed our wildest dreams. Thanks for reading, please share and comment however you like! ("It's a miracle / dreams are made of emotion" played as i re-read that firct conclusion!)

       Ohm, and in case I didn't clarify, the idea of the magic of separation, within the vast magical world of Love as everything truly is, is that we are never "too far" even if we feel that way in heartbreak. There are other, closer, better loves and other better ways to re-unite with a lover, sometimes. But mostly we can preserve love longer by respecting each other's boundaries and pace at fitting us into them as much as we can and we can achieve greater love and loves by expanding our own boundaries. We are lucky if we can do this with one person for the depth these processes can achieve but usually we learn from each relationship and learn different things in new relationships as we apply those lessons, that seems to be the pattern most people have. The more we choose the amount of separation we want the more we can feel trust to build more intimacy and move beyond those fears and close those distances. But we have to respect and allow the differences, first, and I think that is where a lot of relationships, between people and cultures, go wrong. In a violent society we are all trained to look for differences as an excuse to abuse each other - at least to allow an abusive system to continue instead of protesting it and changing it. But in a loving society we look at differences, even disagreements, as chances to learn more about each other, to change and grow and help each other more effectively. It's good for all of us and it just takes a change of perspective. All of the art world calls us to this Loving World conclusion, like a fairyland destination in the future or just on the other side of our identity shelters. We take these veils down for each other in Love and we put them up, art included, to filter some people out and attract others. We can't be forced into loving and accepting each other and no one would want to, truly. We can only put up masks that attract and repel each other at our desire, and learn to make them more the way we want them to work as we feel the freedom to discover who we are in doing this, and why. We have to have the freedom to be different, to be separate, in various ways, in order to experience the pleasure of discovery and coming together in love, or even the comfort of staying apart when such is the case. But we are all connected and we can make the most of this, even with the idea of intentional separations.

       We have separation between nations and communities, sometimes so drastic they can be exploited by merchants of weapons to promote and escalate into war. Within nations we have separations between people, usually as part of a system that is unjust to many in order to favor a few. All of that separation needs to be addressed and the evils it causes need to be ended. Between individuals there are separations that need to be respected, boundaries and differences of values. This is appreciating the magic of separation in a world of interconnected, magical love. At the best it is just playing coy or a flirtatious "push", this magic of separation. When it's not between two people in love it's a respect of boundaries and differences, a chance to stay comfortably apart and unchanged or a chance to come together and learn and change from the experience. But it's also between people within us, a magical boundary that allows us to feel like "one" person and separate from others. This can be useful and dangerous. This applies to "others" other so-called "Individuals" in the world and the Other aspects of ourselves, since we all act with different groupings of personalities and struggle in the process of reconciling that with the usually stable "I" we feel. This is a reason for respecting the magical use of the veil even if it is used both to draw us in and keep us out. We use them within ourselves like tapestries to make rooms in a house but we can open up within ourselves, too and overcome divisions within us and become more whole. It is usually because of these divisions within us, in my case insecurity mostly, that we project divisiveness on others and end up driving away the people who are closest to us. But we can overcome that in ourselves and between us. It all comes from recognizing the magic and use of separation and space even in this experience of a time-field where we can't help but tend and lust towards the more eternal experiences of overcoming those bonds and separations between us. We have to keep making them, not for harsh drama when they get out of control, but to enjoy the play of drawing each other in and attracting new loves and ideas to grow, even in directions that we, presuming ourselves the maskmakers, have not anticipated, expected, or could even imagine. The more we look at our own veils as attempts to shield ourselves from these potential futures, the more we see them like Curtain Number One, Two, or Three from Let's Make a Deal, just shielding us from opportunity, the more we will be eager to build the courage to open them. ("Miss me Blind"just concluded with the re-read. Now I will exit before I get caught up in "Move Away": "Spirit changed the conversation, steppin stones across the land, I never wanted to be a hero, I never wanted to be a man - I hurt ya darlin, I made you cry, I hurt ya darlin, don't ask me why" - okay, I won't resist, that's too good: Spirit is like the 3rd Eye, I mean, Third I in I and I and I, us and More Us, everyone together, or some people/spirits in particular - stepping stones are usually for streams, across the land is not necessarily manipulation, bad, or wrong but it is peculiar, even out of place, like an imposition on relationships. Or it could be spirit calling him further, away from that love, in a good way that just had to be, laying out a path. Not wanting to be a hero, not wanting to be a man, these can mean different things and I don't want to get into the "move away"/Judgment Day part, in discussion or in life, despite all my claims to appreicate space and veils!!! But the aspect of not wanting to hurt the other, and needing space to keep from doing so, not being able to explain it, not being able to be close, that could relate to not wanting to be a "man", I certainly have always associated the aggressive, furstrated spirit with masculinity and relate to wanting some way around it, some way to not feel so physically dangerous like a bomb, or like I'm on a mission like a hero. But I do want to understand, personally, want to overcome and settle with whatever hero I am meant to be, not any one imposed upon my by social ideals but the one that can change the world and change myself and my experience of it, and whoever I can share that with. "Everyone must feel as I do, love is just to be close to you" Boy George got to, "Love is love is everything to me" by the time I got to let myself go - "everything you say must bring her closer to you")

       Thanks, everyone, for forgiving me and being nice to me and for reading my stuff, and thanks for any criticism, I will take it as a challenge improve myself and become more accessible - I will get better and make some good art with your support!